Why is it so hard on me?

It's 3.23 am in the morning and I should be sleeping but I was doing some research on my future financial planning. To my surprise, everything i had calculated before the reserach was actually a far cry than what i had expected.I teared while I calculated all over again.

All along I had thought that the CPF contribution was 20% but now it had increased to 34.5%.Now i know why the sign of aging population could affect the younger generation so much and finally understand why singaporeans are complaining the high standard of living. But just had I thought that it will dashed my dream of getting a flat in 2 years time,I realised that the downpayment for a new flat is only 10% and not 20% anymore.At least,I could still save up to pay for it.

I was upsat because i'm only 20 and im still in the midst of studying but yet im surfing such sites to plan for my future.Why did my parents let me pay for their wrong doings?Why did all the blows come at one shot?Why did I have to bear with such responsibility at such a tender age?What did I do wrong to deserve all these?Why am i worrying when i should be enjoying?

All these questions kept me pondering for minutes. Even ee aunty asked me whether i want to get engaged next yr so that i can at least get a rented flat. But i was angry,why must i sacrifice my own happiness for the sake of what my parents had done.Why can't I plan my life the way i always wanted it to be?

I told kor kor and asked him why are we forced by situations,isnt it unfair? I thought kor kor would agreed and felt resentful but he didnt.He told me that we should take this positively and should not blame them for it.And from these,we could learn to be more independent.

Should i stop resenting and be the once happy go lucky me?

I think I should.

Good night.